april 2009

Soon he is knocking at my door again. His hard work on me wasn't for less so I take him in again, for over the day only and under the condition that if he still doesnt find a job he goes back to denmark to find something. It seems easier for him to get a job there, also because of the language. Still I have no idea about the truth behind all job promises from Jakob. So far he keeps successfully the illusion of a Jakob with the absolute will and effort to do everything to take responsibility now, take care of job search, being my man. There is no indication for any other plans or any behaviour , or whatsoever could direct to it. After all what happened everyone would get suspicious when he comes with a new promise but when you are caught in, you don't. As soons as he spends time in my apartment he also uses the computer regularly again. Officially for job search and when the job search is over and done I have no problem with him using it for myspace again. But I realize that he starts flirting again the same way as it was when we met on myspace and I just ignored the other profiles. This time I watch his comments and don't accept the lame excusions. 
"You know I just do her a favour." 
"She just asked me to help her to make another friend on her profile upset." 
"She is just a friend."
"It's just meant in a friendly way."
"She loves music."
That are some typical phrases he uses and they haven't changed much to my knowledge. And when he is telling me that he speaks about exactly the same kind of love songs he posted me back then. So, if he does it to everyone it doesn't mean anything. To no one. The comments from some new friends on his page get pretty fast flirtatious and kisses fly through the virtual air as if they want to set a new world record. Of course I ask but again it is all harmless he says and does badtalk about his virtual friends to calm me down. He gets in contact with an old myspace friend who was indeed just a friend and not an affair. And one day he tells me that this friend has offered him a job in germany. I am perplex. But it seems true since I call the friend and get confirmation from her that Jakob has an IT job there in a befriended company if he just wants to. Jakob tells her something about the situation of our relationship and as a result she offers that Jakob could stay with her for the time until he is ready to start that job.
I gladly agree and buy him the train ticket to her place in germany. Until he leaves I tell him to use the time to prepare for the job. Buy him the IT books he needs and try to help him otherwise. I suggest he could create  a new website for that company. He promises to do so as he told me it won't be a problem. Good, i think, and wait if he passes the "test". Again there are so many discussions where he tries to run away from this or to avoid to speak about it, it is more than irreal how he strugggles to twist everything he ever said or promised. But I don't let him out and want to see what he can. 
D.
_________________________________________
She and me does not now at this point that Jakob does not have the abilities and never had the abilities to fulfill the requirements of any IT job. But the longer he "prepares" for the job the more obvious it gets. We later find out that also his "preparation" is a deception because long after the relationship is over I find one of the IT books which I bought him very well hidden behind my bookshelf and in another IT book which he pretended to read there were exactly three pages marked (which he read again and again and again...) the rest of the 300 pages were untouched.
(see also previous chapter "conditions for mind control")